Mixed-faith UCSB Families Find Holidays a Rich Blend

As the air becomes crisp and calendars fill with the season's activities, the growing number of mixed-faith American families has resulted in unconventional celebrations of a variety of holidays. Some of these families are created by divorce and remarriage; many others result from the pluralism of immigration or the international bent of a more highly educated society. "Clearly, there is a trend of celebrating mixed faiths," said Wade Clark Roof, chair and professor of religious studies. He has written about this in his book "Spiritual Marketplace: Baby Boomers and the Remaking of American Religion." Though Roof found mixed-faith marriages in many places, the "modern university brings more diversity together than just about any other institution." UCSB has a number of such couples, only two of which can be highlighted here. Scott Marcus, who teaches ethnomu-sicology for the Music Department, is married to Zaveeni Khan-Marcus, director of the MultiCultural Center (MCC) for the Division of Student Affairs. He still smiles about the rabbi's comment at their mostly traditional Jewish wedding in Santa Barbara nearly 10 years ago. "He said to us, 'I'm sure you did not think you would be marrying a Muslim girl from Sri Lanka, or that you would be marrying a Jewish boy from Queens,' or words to that effect," recalled Scott. The couple knew their union would be an unusual blend of customs and cultures. The bride wore a red wedding gown, "which was more Indian Muslim than Sri Lankan Muslim traditional dress," explained Zaveeni. Her Sri Lankan father's wedding gift to them was a Seder plate, a ceremonial fixture used at meals during Passover, a holy time for Jews. "I was very touched by the gift," said the associate professor, adding that he liked the fact that his Muslim father-in-law had given the Marcus family its first-ever Seder plate. His family followed Jewish beliefs generally but observed few of the rituals. Hanukkah, however, he recalled as "a joyous time, perhaps because Christmas was not Jewish so the excitement was transferred to this relatively minor holiday." Hanukkah, a celebration also called the Feast of Lights, will begin on Dec. 10 this year. Ramadan, the Muslim holy month devoted to renewing one's religious faith through fasting, reading the Koran, and prayer, will end on Dec. 20. "Islam is very much a part of my life," said Zaveeni. "I was born Muslim and will die with Muslim burial rites." She practiced Ramadan's ritual fasting when she lived in Sri Lanka but has not done so in the U.S. where her family grew with two boysÑZiyad, 8, and Ari, 5Ñand she nurtured a career. Last year, her brother and his family moved to the area and now the

	Subhash Suri reads a Hindu story with daughter, Kavita, and son, Sachin, in the home they share with wife and mother, Linda.

Marcuses welcome the opportunity for their sons to observe Islamic practices. Zaveeni's brother and sister-in-law fast during Ramadan. "Neither Scott nor I are very religious as such; its more a cultural identity," explains Zaveeni. "But we want our kids to have traditions." Subhash and Linda Suri try to expose their children to the customs of India, where he was born in a medium-sized city in Uttar Pradesh, but do not stress his Hinduism. Their daughter, Kavita, 7, enjoys being read Indian stories, loves Indian pop music, and tries to teach her mother Hindi songs. She thinks the ceremonial Hindu group prayer of pooja is "just fun," her mother says, but does not give it any meaning. Subhash notes that their daughter also likes Diwali, the Hindu Festival of Lights, which "has a bit of Christmas Eve flavor where we decorate houses." It begins in December. "Hindus celebrate the union of everything," explains the professor of computer science. "It's more interesting to both of us to be married to people of different backgrounds. [Different faiths] is not a big issue because we do not have strong religious convictions." "I've always been fascinated by other ways of life and cultures," says Linda, a programmer with a local software firm. "My parents taught me that human life was the most valuable thing and all else follows from that. The Golden Rule is simply good ethics." Subhash and Linda fell in love when they were graduate students at Johns Hopkins University. Their wedding was a mix of Hindu ritualÑthey each walked around a circle of fire and mispronounced Sanskrit hymnsÑand a civil ceremony. "Neither of us knew what was going to happen," she recalled. Their journey continues, and now a son, Sachin, also toddles along with the family. He seemed to enjoy the Indian DVDs they rented for Thanksgiving, and his sister seems more than happy to teach him a few Hindi favorites.